So, here we are. As you’re reading this, many moments have passed since I wrote this article. But here’s the thing: right now, it is probably safe to assume that what you’re feeling is what I am feeling as I write this. So, again, here we are. Lost. Without direction. Without a safety net. Needing change.
I try to be honest with myself and others when it comes to who I am, but that can be difficult when I feel like I’m still trying to create myself. How do I decide who to be as I am building myself from the ground up?
Well, thankfully we are here together. So, as I stumble my way along my journey, I’d like to share a few things that I feel have helped me to gain some direction.
1: Identify what is making you feel stuck. This shouldn’t be difficult to pin down- what is the main thing that you feel dissatisfied with in your everyday life? Is it school? Work? Your home life? Often times, the thing that steals our sense of direction is something we cannot change. What we can change, though, is how we approach that thing.
2. Find a way to shift your perspective. This step is both healing and eye-opening… It is also difficult. For example, if you are a broke college student trying to make ends meet (I see you!), it is probably difficult to keep up your motivation. Assignments are overwhelming, and it feels like teachers don’t understand that you have a job and a life outside of their classroom. I get it, I really do. But, why are you there in the first place? Something had to motivate you enough in the first place for you to put yourself in school. You have to go back to that motive to be able to get through the day sometimes. While you may feel helpless in this current moment, know that you at some point decided to better yourself and your future and this was how you were going to do it.
3. Learn something new. This doesn’t have to take up a lot of time and money. Maybe you want to learn French- okay, where do you start? There are plenty of free resources (namely YouTube and Duolingo to start) that will give you access to a wealth of knowledge. Maybe you want to learn all about mushrooms and which ones are edible and which ones aren’t. Maybe you want to learn how to crochet. Whatever it is that you want to learn, it doesn’t have to bring in income for it to be valuable to your life. Read that again if you need to. It doesn’t have to bring in income for it to be valuable to your life. It is okay to learn something and to enjoy it purely for what it is rather than what it can do for you.
4. Take a break. This will obviously look different for everyone. Maybe this is a weekend spent learning how to bake bread and take a mental break from life. Maybe it’s a study abroad semester. Maybe it’s committing yourself to one month of yoga. Whatever your lifestyle allows, find a way to take a break. It is so easy to fantasize about starting with a blank slate, but it can feel impossible to do. Once you take a break, you may come to realize that each moment of your day starts off as a blank slate. Perhaps you had previously felt like you had already bought a pre-drawn design for your slate, so you stuck with it. However, hopefully after your break away from the monotony, you realize that you truly can do whatever you want with that blank slate. You don’t have to wait until New Year’s Day, or next month, or next week, or even tomorrow morning. Every moment is yours to decide who you want to be.
5. Try a change of plans. This isn’t for everyone- but it doesn’t always hurt to try it out. Let’s say you’ve gone through all of the previous steps, and you’ve come to the conclusion that you truly need something completely different in your life to feel satisfied. Maybe you’ll need a license for it, like working in real estate or certain healthcare jobs. Okay, so would it be the end of the world for you to work on getting that license and trying it out? (Spoiler alert: it’s not the end of the world!) Best case scenario, this new thing really does pique your interest and you truly found something that you would rather pursue than what your original plan was. Worst case scenario, you spent some time and money pursuing something that didn’t pan out. Either way, you learned something about yourself, and that is quite alright! Not all learning experiences blossom into money and opportunities- often times, they end up being a lesson to you of what is not a good fit for you. You may have to teach yourself to be okay with either outcome.
Now, let’s stumble through this messy growth process together and see where it takes us. À plus tard! (That’s French for “See you later!”)
An Olive Writes 